Anytime, Anywhere

When I decided to breastfeed Yohann, it didn't hit me yet that this would mean I would breastfeed the little boy outside of home. I guess it was because we were cooped inside our home most of the time, as I was also recovering strength after giving birth via CS. But when he turned three months and still refused to drink even expressed milk from a bottle, it was either I just give up going out of our house until he's weaned, or muster the courage needed to feed him anytime, anywhere!

Initially, I had reservations with breastfeeding in public. First off, I didn't want to show even just a hint of skin in front of people I didn't know. Also, I understand that some people are offended with even a little breast exposure in public places. But my reservations slowly disappeared with every trip to the mall with the little boy. The first time we brought him to the mall, he immediately cried for milk even before we were supposed to eat. So there I was in some restaurant table, feeding Yohann with just a cloth diaper for cover. I felt a bit uneasy that first time, but then again the baby's needs are more important than my uneasiness.

Several trips to the mall later, I've learned to dress up in such a way that feeding Yohann in public would be easier and comfortable for both of us. I've decided against a nursing cover as I feel that this would only attract more attention and would be more uncomfortable for Yohann. And, knowing him, I bet he'd only try to break free of the cover and forget about feeding altogether. 

So far, so good. We've been breastfeeding at restaurants, in front of our neighbor's house, in our pedia's clinic, at the SSS Marikina office, in church, right in the middle of the men's shoes department, in front of friends and strangers alike. I have gotten over my initial shyness and already feel no shame whenever I offer my milk to the little boy. After all, these breasts are made to nourish and shame be on anyone who would take offense at seeing an act of pure love and nurturing. I am a breastfeeding momma, and proud of it. :)  

No pain, No gain - Part 2

Since I wasn't producing enough milk to satisfy Yohann's hunger, my nips were cracked and hurting like hell, and Yohann's cries were already heartbreaking to hear, we already started feeding him formula. A nurse friend also told me to let the nips heal first before continuing with breastfeeding. I took that piece of advice with gratitude as by this time, they already hurt too much it was traumatic for me to even see Yohann wanting to take my nips into his mouth! Haha.

I felt good when I finally saw Yohann feeding, sucking on his bottle like there's no tomorrow. But I felt guilty too, especially when well-meaning friends cheered me on to just continue with breastfeeding, no matter how much it hurt. I had decided then that after taking the malunggay capsules and my sisters' concoctions and the milk would start to come in in copious amounts, that I would return to my original plan of exclusive breastfeeding and no formula. But several days later, it still wasn't working and Yohann seemed to respond well to his milk. I admit I almost gave up on breastfeeding, especially when I tried pumping milk and all I got was several drops after almost an hour. My breasts were already painful, and my hands numb but I didn't even get a single ounce of milk! It was discouraging, to say the least. It frustrated me, and made me feel like I wasn't doing a good enough job.

Thankfully, before I completely gave up on breastfeeding, I noticed that my breasts began to feel fuller and heavier; milk started to come out even when I wasn't feeding Yohann. I even felt feverish one day, and I realized this was because I was lactating and the milk wasn't being consumed. So I tried getting the baby to latch on me again. Little by little, the milk came in and I started pumping again. The first time I was able to produce 2 ounces, I wanted to jump for joy! 

Since then, my milk had consistently grown in supply. We adapted mixed-feeding with Yohann, gradually decreasing his formula intake as my milk supply increased. Just before he turned two months old last June 3, he decided he didn't want any more formula milk and wanted more and more of mommy's milk. So now, I exclusively breastfeed Yohann, and it looks like we're doing a good job out of it as he's grown so much heavier and bigger. He doesn't look like a two month old baby and he is fast out-growing his clothes. I therefore conclude that breast milk really is best for babies :)